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Optimize compile to 1: avoid oom 2: minimize swap usage 3: avoid threads starvation when letting ninja decide how many workers to spawn or manual MAX_JOBS "guesses". Logic is to take the min value of MAX_JOBS auto-calculated by two metrics: 1: cpu cores 2: free memory. This should allow flash-attn to compile close to the most efficient manner under any consumer/server env. (#832)